Sanji Kitetsu
by NMTD
Summary: Sanji the cursed blade meets his next master... or victim, depending on his mood.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:**

 **This was just a spur of the moment thing. The idea was to continue it following Zoro's battles in canon, but I don't have any specific plans for it yet, so it might be left as a one shot for a long while. Just so you know.**

* * *

 **Sanji Kitetsu Chapter 1**

"You want 2 swords with only 100,000?! If you're looking to buy one sword each for around 50,000, I've only got blunt pieces of trash to sell, y'hear?!" the interest in the store owner's voice dies as soon as he hears the number. Sanji knows what's coming next. It happens on a daily basis. He leans on the back edge of the barrel, purposely hiding his aura and his eye-catching blue gem behind the hilts of the multitude of unnamed blades around him. He's spent long enough in this store to learn the trick of being unnoticeable.

It's not that Sanji's not starving for some blood and action, quite literally, but it's not like he needs blood to survive. Besides, if leaving this store for some action means he has to work to end the life of yet another piece of scum who calls himself a swordsman, life in this barrel isn't all that bad in comparison. The store owner is a sly business fox, but at least he takes good care of his swords and can be a decent human being at times. Sanji closes his inner eyes and dozes off to the sound of chattering between two shoppers.

"Ah! That sword is... I remember seeing this in my book before!" A sweet voice jolts Sanji awake, along with the smell of blood. Next, a delicate hand wraps around Sanji's sheathe and pulls him from the barrel. "Sanji Kitetsu! You should definitely buy this sword!" Aww, Tashigi-chan finally recognizes him! He's been watching the marine beauty from the corner of the store ever since she began coming for sword maintenance a few months ago. Sanji can't help but melt in her grip.

"Mister! Are you really selling this sword for only 50,000? That's amazing! This is another Wazamono sword! It should normally be sold for a million beli. Its predecessor 'Niji Kitetsu' is one of the 21 O Wazamono swords, while 'Shoji Kitetsu' is one of the 12 Saijo O Wazamono swords!" Aww... She knows his brothers' names and grades too! Sanji wonders if it'd be worth the hardships he has to endure to have Tashigi-chan as his master. Sanji's had a female master before, the only one he didn't end up killing, of course. But it doesn't mean he's had a good time with her. He'd never again want to be stuck in the hell where he's ordered to cut down a lady by another lady.

"No, I changed my mind! I can't sell that sword!" There he goes again. If that indecisive fox doesn't want to sell Sanji, he should just keep him in the back room! Why bother having him out in a barrel if he'll say the same fucking thing every time someone picks Sanji up?

"It's cursed, right?" A husky voice vibrates through Sanji's hilt. He hasn't noticed until now that he's no longer in Tashigi-chan's delicate hands, but as soon as he does, he's drowning in the smell of blood. "I can tell." the man says. Whoever this guy is, he's a wild one.

Which is why Sanji isn't half as surprised as the other humans in the room when the man says he likes Sanji and will take him right after hearing about his "cursed" history. It's really not as dark and twisted as the owner makes it sound. Sanji's older brothers are blood-thirsty simpletons who merely follow the smell of blood and cut everything they see, but Sanji's different. He's only serving justice when he decides to disobey orders from his masters and cut what he wants. Well, justice and ladies, because the word of a lady _is_ justice. Like now, he's having some serious cravings for blood, and the man smells delicious, but he doesn't have a good excuse to cut the guy... yet.

"Then how about this? Why don't we test what's stronger? My luck... or its curse?" the man smirks as he sends Sanji spinning in the air and sticks out his arm. Here comes his excuse. If the idiot's asking to be cut, why not? Sanji eyes the man's outstretched arm for a good entry point as he cuts graceful arcs through the air high above the man's green head.

But wait, if he draws blood here, he'd get his fill and be back in the barrel, starving for another eternity. Besides, what fun is it to end the cheeky swordsman right here and now? A cocky bastard like him needs to be slowly torn apart from the inside, one whispered death threat at a time. He said he wanted a test, so Sanji has one of his own. When the tip of his blade passes the side of the man's face, he lets out a low sigh.

 _I see. You're the type of idiot who rushes to his death._ Sanji breathes. The only ones who can hear their swords are those devoted to improving their swordsmanship, so there's no point sticking himself to a guy who can't hear him. If there's no reaction, he'd just drink his fill of the man's blood and go back to dozing in the barrel.

 _The only one who has the right to call me an idiot is me._ The man's smirk only grows wider. Sanji barely manages to avoid cutting through the flesh in his shock. He's never seen a swordsman who can answer his sword through... What was that? Telepathy? Anyway, he passed, and at least he's not all talk. Maybe it'd be interesting following him around. Sanji plants his blade in the wooden floor and waits.

"I'll take it!" the man declares happily and pulls Sanji from the floor. The store owner takes a few seconds to recover from the shock before rushing to the back room to retrieve Yuki-tan, his prized family heirloom, and offering it to the man for free.

 _Pleased to meet you, shitty moss. I'll be in your care, but if you ever step out of line I'd personally end your life. Don't say I haven't warned you._ Sanji mutters as they leave the store together.

 _Are all cursed blades this talkative? I'm your master now you know. Show some respect, curly._ The man smirks and runs a thumb over the golden swirl around the blue gem on his pommel.

That bastard. Sanji will definitely cut him one day.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sanji Kitetsu Chapter 2**

Sanji didn't think he'd get his much needed fill of blood and action so soon, but he's got nothing to complain about. Well... except he's now questioning some life choices he made today.

 _So the guy on that execution platform with a cutlass on his neck is..._ Sanji muses as he runs his tip through the flesh of another nameless pirate, savouring the texture on the way out. A declaration of wanting to become the pirate king echoes throughout the square.

 _My captain, yes. Now focus on your job. We need to bring that execution platform down!_ The man drives him through the arm of the next enemy without a moment's pause.

Sanji hears a faint shriek from one of the other swords. It must be Yuki-tan. As far as Sanji knows, the store owner's family doesn't have a single swordsman in generations, so it's possible that Yuki-tan's been sitting on the shelf in the back room ever since he was made. This could be his first battle. Of course he'd be shocked.

 _Hey moss head, go easy on Yuki there will ya? It might be his first time seeing blood. I'll do his share._

 _Who?_ The man's movements give no sign of slowing. It's hard to tell if he's listening at all.

 _Yuki, Yubashiri. You know, your other new sword?_

 _I'll try,_ the swordsman sheathes the black sword and takes the white one from his mouth. _But she'd better catch up quick. The way things are going, I can't afford much of a break for her._

 _I should've known you're the slave driver type of master. And it's 'him'. Yuki is a boy._

 _If you have time to complain, cut faster._

 _Listen here, shitty moss, nobody tells ME to cut faster and get away with it!_ Sanji flings himself in the direction of a group of five pirates coming at them. He cuts four of them, and his blade brushes the hair of the fifth before he's pulled back by a surprisingly firm grip on his hilt.

"Zoro! ... Usopp! Nami! Sorry, but it looks like I'm dead." the boy on the execution platform grins.

"Shit!" the swordsman mutters. Sanji feels the grip on his hilt tightens further as a bolt of lightning strikes the platform. The platform crumbles in a burst of flame. The boy picks up his hat from among the debris and cheerfully declares that he's safe.

 _Do you believe in God?_ Sanji asks after a long sigh of relief.

 _Stop talking and get ready. We've got more trouble heading our way._ The swordsman commands, but Sanji can feel the slight relaxation of his grip.

* * *

"Jeez, these guys are so persistent." the man runs down the street in the rain, his three swords sheathed on his side. The boy he calls his captain follows closely behind him, and after that a mob of marines.

 _Wanna just stop and fight them off?_ Sanji smirks. He's just had a good dose of action after a long break, but you can never have too much action.

 _There'll be no end to them, and we need to get to the ship fast._ His master insists.

"Roronoa Zoro!" Sanji hears a sweet and familiar voice ahead of them and can't help but wiggle in the little room he has in his sheathe. Ah, it's Tashigi-chan! Has she come to take him away after all?

"To think that you were Roronoa Zoro! And a pirate, too! You were just toying with me all along!" the beautiful marine girl shouts.

 _You bastard, what did you do to her?_ Sanji hisses at the man.

 _Just shut up will you? You were right there the last time I met her._ The man hisses back.

"I shall take back that Wado Ichimonji." Tashigi-chan draws her sword and points it at Zoro.

"Just try it." Zoro smirks and draws the white sword before telling the boy to go on without him.

 _You brute, don't you dare harm that lady! I warned you! I'll cut you down you hear me?_ Sanji snaps at the man as the two swords collide.

 _Then you'd better make sure of that yourself, curly._ Zoro removes one hand from the white sword and draws Sanji from his sheathe.

 _What the fuck are you- wait, wait, WAIT NO YOU BASTARD! I SWEAR I'LL SHRED YOU TO PIECES YOU FUCKING SCUM!_ Sanji snarls as he sees the marine lady's sword spin through the air and his own blade approaching her unguarded shoulder at alarming speed. He manages to reach the wall behind her with his tip and slow the downward swing to a stop, barely scraping her jacket.

"I can't hand over this sword to anyone, no matter what." the swordsman whispers to the lady before sheathing his swords and walking away, completely ignoring Sanji's ongoing string of curses.

"Why didn't you cut me down? Is it because I'm a woman?" Tashigi-chan calls after him. Sanji hears one of Zoro's mental strings snap as the lady continues her rant about gender equality, and soon the swordsman replies with his own explosion of pent up frustration about a childhood friend. Sanji hears a string of laughter from the white sword over the bickering.

 _Zoro's an interesting guy, don't you think?_ The white sword muses, her voice strikingly similar to Tashigi-chan's.

 _I don't know about interesting, more like sadistic if you ask me._ Sanji huffs, drawing another string of bright laughter from her.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Please note that if you leave a review as a guest, I can't reply and thank you directly, but I do appreciate your feedback just the same. As proof, this chapter is dedicated to a guest who left me a prompt (and those who are worried about the Straw Hats not having a cook). :P**

 **Guest on Jun. 24th: I think it would be funny if Sanji also ordered Zoro how to cook.**

 **By the way, prompts are always welcome, but I can't guarantee I'd be able to do them with my limited writing ability.**

* * *

 **Sanji Kitetsu Chapter 3**

Sanji is overjoyed to find that his moss master's pirate crew includes two ladies, two gorgeous red heads each with her own brand of feisty personality. It's such a shame that he can't do anything beyond admiring their beauty from afar, being stuck to the shitty moss who's always exercising on deck. He'd much rather spend his days in the women's dorm watching the studious navigator go through mountains of maps at her desk or in the kitchen listening to the fiery cook's constant and charming laughter throughout the preparation of every meal.

Today is one of those rare occasions where Zoro decides to finish his morning routine and head to lunch early, one of Sanji's lucky days where he gets to watch their beautiful new cook do her passionate cooking dance around the kitchen. But even a wonderful day like this can be tainted by the presence of his mannerless ape of a master.

 _Hey shitty moss, Carmen-chan's cooking! Did anyone ever tell you it's rude to sleep in the presence of a lady who's working?_ Sanji tears his attention away from Carmen's dramatic laughter as she skins and slices an onion while spinning. His master snores loudly in response, letting his stinky and sweaty body sink lower into the corner of the walls.

 _Fuck, at least shower before you come in here! You're contaminating her precious work environment!_ Still, he hears nothing except for Carmen's angelic laughter and low snoring.

 _Do you hear me? Get up and clean yourself, or do I need to cut some manners into your thick skin?!_ Sanji yells over another string of sweet laughter.

"Shut the fuck up will you? You're annoying as hell! I'm trying to take a nap here, you know!" Zoro finally wakes up and shouts at his sword. Sanji watches in horror as Carmen gasps before throwing her knife in the sink and running out the door in tears.

 _Go after her, you idiot!_ Sanji demands.

"What? Why? What's her problem anyway?" Zoro lazily rubs his eyes.

 _You raised your voice at her and made her cry, so go and apologize!_

"Huh?!"

"I'm hungry! Is there food yet?" Luffy pokes his head through the door.

"Zoro what did you do? Carmen came into the women's dorm crying that she never wants to see your face again." the other gorgeous red head pushes the captain aside and walks into the kitchen.

"Iono, not my fault. I was just napping." Zoro yawns.

 _It was ALL your fault you shitty moss brain!_ Sanji hisses.

"So is there food?" Luffy and his stomach whine at the same time.

"Anyway, she doesn't seem to be in any condition to finish cooking, and Luffy can't wait much longer. You started it Zoro, so you do something about it." Nami waves her delicate hand and turns to the door.

"What? Why should-" Zoro starts his protest.

 _Do NOT talk back to Nami-san like that! Go and check what we have first. I'll help you, so shut up and get to work, shithead!_ Sanji urges.

"Tch, like you'll be any help! What can you do? Chop things for me?" Zoro mutters, but Sanji ignores him and examines the half cooked lunch for the crew. It's not as bad as he thought. The bread and butter are fresh from the morning. The steaks and side dishes are resting on the rack and can be served in a few minutes. There are even desserts and drinks in the fridge. All that's missing is the onion soup Carmen-chan started preparing for, and all the ingredients, including the broth, are ready to go. If they serve the main dish first, the soup should be done in time.

 _Melt the large butter stick in that pot over medium heat. Remember to keep stirring._

"Since when do you get to order me around?"

 _Do you want my help? Or do you want to screw this up, waste your crew's precious food, and let your captain starve?_ Zoro glares at Sanji's blue gem for a few seconds before obediently turning on the stove.

 _Make sure you stir the whole pot, not just a fixed circle. Butter burns easily, so any part you don't stir will burn._

"Who cares! It's all the same once it's in your stomach, right?" Zoro kicks a rubber hand away from the resting steaks.

 _Burnt food causes cancer, so just do what I tell you already, shitty moss._ His master shoots him another look of impatience and complies.

 _Good. Now add the onion, thyme, bay leaves, and half a teaspoon of salt._

"Time? How the fuck do I add time?!"

 _T-h-y-m-e. It's a spice. Should be in one of the bottles on that rack. There, the third one from the left on the bottom shelf. No, LEFT! How can you not know the difference between left and right at your age?! Wait, how much are you planning to put in?! Don't open the cap! You'll dump the whole bottle in! Just a shake or two will do._

"You're fucking annoying. Give better instructions already!" Zoro slaps another rubber hand with his ladle.

 _It's called common sense, you bastard! Stir and turn down the heat! It's gonna burn if you move any slower! Three bay leaves will do. Be careful not to break them. We need to take them out later._

"What's the point of that?" the man huffs and reaches for the salt.

 _Half a TEASPOON you idiot! That's a fucking ladle! See that spoon in the salt jar? Use that!_

"Say that sooner next time. How would I know which one you want?"

 _Only a fucking moss brain like you would not know the difference between a teaspoon and a ladle! Now stir and set the oven to broil._

"To what?" Zoro cocks an eyebrow and pinches a rubber hand out of the bread basket.

 _Broil. It's on the knob in the middle. And call the crew in for lunch._

"But it's not done yet."

 _It'll be done by the time they finish the main dish. Just do it._

"Luffy, call the crew in for lunch." Zoro says to the boy who's been making unsuccessful attempts to steal the steak and bread the entire time. Luffy cheers and pokes his head out the door to relay the message.

"Who were you talking to, Zoro?" Luffy turns to the swordsman before the rest of the crew arrives.

"My shitty cooking instructor." Luffy gives him a puzzled head tilt and shrugs.

 _Be grateful, shithead. You'd thank me when they find out you didn't ruin their lunch._

"Yeah, thanks for the help." the swordsman hums and returns to stirring, sounding surprisingly sincere.

* * *

 **A/N: I do find Carmen's laugh obnoxious, so I can't say I'm sorry. XD**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:**

 **I didn't follow this prompt exactly, but here's what I tried:**

 **Minecraft Guardiansaiyan wrote on July 21st:**

 **Telepathy is great and hopefully the main crew will be able to hear Sanji soon as well...Luffy might even ask him officially to be a crew member...**

* * *

 **Sanji Kitetsu Chapter 4**

Sanji's used to being cleaned. As despicable as his previous masters were, every one of them was diligent in taking care of his swords. So Sanji knows there are a couple things he can do while being cleaned besides staying perfectly still to make the swordsman's life easy.

For example, the first wipe-down is the perfect opportunity to give his new master the tiniest but most painful cut on the very tip of his finger, like... so.

The taste of fresh blood and a small pause in Zoro's movement are the only indications of his success, which is rather disappointing.

"I thought we're all good now. You even helped me cook." Zoro continues his cleaning routine with practiced ease.

 _Ha! As if we can ever be good again after you made me attack a damsel in distress! I only helped you cook because I didn't want your innocent crewmates to starve._

"Damsel in distress my ass. And you honestly think you'd pull that shit off if I was serious about cutting her down?"

 _Try me!_ Sanji says in defiance, and the swordsman snorts.

 _Hey, you should talk to Yuki. You're his first real master, so he might need a pep talk from you before he can be of any use in battles._ Sanji hums, relaxing at the gentle taps of the powdered ball.

"Fair enough. I'll see what I can do. I'm cleaning her next."

 _HIM. I told you, Yuki is a boy._

"I thought all swords are female."

 _Now that's just rude. I'm obviously a gentleman myself._

"How can you tell? I mean it's not like you guys reproduce." Zoro turns him over in one hand to examine the blade.

 _It's not about sex, shitty moss. It's about our sense of self, our identity. Some of us have a consciousness from the time we were made. Others,_ he nods to the white sword, _acquire it later from... certain experiences._

"Experiences?" the swordsman repeats, sounding confused. Sanji puzzles at Zoro's reaction. He's talked to the white sword in his spare time and has learned the gist of their time as childhood rivals and how she got trapped in the sword. Surely even his dimwit master must've realized who that voice belongs to after so many years of listening to it. Then again, if Zoro doesn't know, it's not Sanji's place to tell him.

The two of them remain silent as Zoro finishes cleaning and coats the blade in a thin layer of cool oil before sheathing him and placing him next to the other two swords. Sanji watches as Zoro's hand gently brushes the white sword and reaches for Yuki's black hilt. He unsheathes the black sword and lays the blade over his lap.

"Shhh... It's OK. We're just cleaning today." the swordsman whispers and wipes down the blade with care.

 _It was kind of you to look out for Yuki like that, Sanji._ The white sword says.

 _C-could it be that you've fallen in love with me?_ Sanji twirls in his constricting sheath. Ah, love! It has finally come for him! But the white sword only giggles in reply.

 _Zoro doesn't show much of it, but he has a kind heart too. He never meant to use you to harm the marine girl. I'm sure of it._

 _You're giving that brute way too much credit! He doesn't even recognize this sweet angelic voice of yours after so many years!_ Ah, heartbreak! Why must it always follow so closely behind?

 _That's... not his fault._ The white sword sighs.

* * *

 _Hey mossy, ask our sweet navigator if she needs a snack or a drink. She looks like she needs one._ Sanji grunts at his half-asleep master at the dining table.

The whole crew is gathered here because of the raging storm outside. Zoro has his head resting on the table at the corner seat. Directly across from him is the beautiful navigator surrounded by stacks of maps that cover this half of the table. The other three members are in the middle of a rather intense game of cards on the other half of the table.

 _Huh? Why should I?_

 _Becase that's what a gentleman does! In fact you should really ask Carmen-chan too, but you'd probably make it sound like you're insulting her skills as a cook instead, so don't bother._

 _Tch, you do it since you're such an expert at this 'gentleman' thing._ Zoro pulls the cursed sword out of his haramaki and slams it onto the map-covered table top before lowering his head once more to sleep.

 _I WOULD if she could hear me, shithead! Hey shithead! I need a translator here! Hey!_ Sanji shouts in futile protest until he finds himself hovering in mid air before his sheathed blade whacks the back of swordsman's head.

"Do you know how close I was to calculating the location of the lighthouse?" Nami shrieks in frustration while repeatedly attacking Zoro's head with Sanji's sheath. "If you'd just give me 5 more minutes of peace! Just 5 more mi-..."

The navigator freezes mid-sentence, the cursed blade still dangling from her hand. She pulls Sanji closer to examine the gem on the hilt.

"Is that...?" She runs a soft finger over the blue gem. Sanji shivers in delight.

"Zoro, you got this sword for free because the store owner liked you, right? How about I give you the original price? How much did you say it was?... 50,000?" the navigator stands Sanji on the tip of his sheath to examine the hilt.

"Wait, what are you..." the swordsman peels his sleepy face off the table and nurses the back of his head.

"OK fine. How about 100,000?" Nami digs a nail along the side of the gem, trying to find a way to pry it off.

"I'm not-"

"Sigh... OK. How about 5% of the selling price I can get at the next island? It'd be more than anything you can get for it with your negotiation skills." Nami gestures to Usopp for his tool bag. The long nose complies and returns to his game of cards. Nami takes out a small knife and starts chipping at the golden swirls around the gem.

"I'm not selling my sword, witch!" Zoro yanks the sword out of her hand and shoots her a hard glare. Nami gasps in shock. The others put their card game on hold to watch the scene unfold.

 _You mannerless ape! How dare you call her such a foul name!_

 _What, you'd rather have your hilt disfigured with a knife?_ Sanji would rather not, but that's not the point here! Nobody calls a lady names on his watch!

"Then why were you giving it to me?" Nami crosses her arms, her anger overtaking the shock.

"I wasn't. HE wanted to talk to you. I figured he'd give up if he had a try." Zoro waves Sanji in the air before sliding him back into his place in the haramaki.

"He? You assign genders to your swords?" Carmen fans herself with her cards.

"He can talk? Can I try? Hi, I'm Luffy! Nice to meet you!" Luffy leans to Zoro's side to greet the sword.

"Uhm... guys, this is very interesting and all, but weren't we supposed to be getting closer to the entrance of Grand-Line by riding the storm?" Usopp points at one of the windows. "The storm is gone. Does that mean we're here?" The crew turns to Nami, whose face is now paper white.

"Oh no, we've entered calm belt..."


	5. Chapter 5

**Sanji Kitetsu Chapter 5**

"Zoro, wake up! We're in an emergency!" Usopp panics, but the moss head swordsman only snores softly in response.

"The waves are getting higher!"

"Iceberg spotted at 10 o'clock!"

"And now there's fog!"

"What is WRONG with this ocean?!"

 _Hey shitty moss, shouldn't you get up and help?_ Sanji finds himself once again gritting his teeth at his master's lack of contribution to the crew. Sure, he has done bits and pieces to help his crew out of the Calm Belt, up Reverse Mountain, and survive the encounter with the giant whale, but so did everyone else. That's certainly no excuse for his current lack of action during their first Grand-Line-level navigational crisis.

 _They'll handle it just fine._ The swordsman yawns and stretches out his legs. _Besides, someone has to be rested and ready to move when they're all tired out._

"We just grazed the iceberg!"

"There's water leaking in the lower deck! Hurry up and seal it!"

"The clouds are moving too fast! Raise the sails! The winds are too strong!"

"Oh no! The sail's tearing!"

 _Maybe if your lazy ass would get up and help, they wouldn't BE all tired out in the first place!_ Sanji dutifully tries to correct the moss brain's attitude, knowing full well that it's pointless. Sure enough, the swordsman ignores his rambling and changes the topic.

 _Did you talk to all your previous masters too?_

 _Huh?... Yeah. Most of them didn't have other swords for me to talk to. It gets boring after a while._

 _And they could all hear you?_

 _There were two or three who couldn't. They couldn't be called swordsmen by any standards. They had no respect for swords or swordsmanship, so naturally my voice couldn't reach them. Why?_ Sanji asks when he finds the brute staring into the stormy sky deep in thought. He receives no answer.

 _Let me guess. You unknowingly offended the lady in white, and she never talked to you since. I can't say I'm surprised._ Sanji teases.

 _I've never heard Wado's voice._ The man replies quietly, making it sound much like a shameful confession.

 _Wado?_ Sanji prompts, and Zoro reaches over to gently tilt the hilt of the white sword.

 _Ha! You're probably not good enough to be recognized as her master._ Sanji snickers. To his surprise, the swordsman lowers his head in silent agreement. That can't be true though. Even from the few short conversations Sanji had with the white sword, he can tell that the white blade adores the moss head. Besides, they were childhood friends.

 _Maybe she's just not the talkative type._ Sanji offers. It's not quite true since she's been having rather normal conversations with the cursed blade himself. But what the moss head is brewing about is definitely not the real reason.

 _Her previous master's name was Kuina, a friend and a rival to me at the time. Kuina used to tell me how much of a chatterbox Wado was, and yet she's never said a single word to me. She probably still thinks of Kuina as her master after all these years. Of course I wouldn't be able to hear her. It was my fault... I failed to prevent Kuina's death._ The swordsman grips the white sheath.

 _You know that a sword of her grade can easily kill you in battle if she hates you, right?_ Sanji never dreamed that he'd want to offer words of comfort to this insensitive brute one day, but the depth of misunderstanding between this man and his beloved white sword is starting to grate his nerves.

 _The only reason Wado still puts up with me is because I'm keeping my promise to Kuina and becoming the strongest swordsman on her behalf._

Before Sanji can think of what to say to that, his master stands, stretches, and manages to piss off the rest of the exhausted crew with his tactlessness in record time. Sanji turns to the white sword, who has kept her peace throughout their conversation.

 _Pardon me for prying, but care to explain? This Kuina he was talking about-_

 _Yes, it's me. None of it was his fault though. I was the one who decided to end my own life. There was nothing Zoro could've done to prevent it._

 _Then why won't you talk to him? Ah, I mean I'm just curious. Of course I'm not trying to accuse you in any way. You probably have your reasons. I mean a lady like yourself wouldn't possibly-_

 _You see how much he obsesses over my death. It's been ten years, and he still thinks about it every waking moment. He deserves to move on. The last thing he needs is a constant reminder of the past._

 _But he-_

"Hmm... There's something sinister about your faces... What did you say your names were again?" the swordsman pulls at Sanji's hilt as he leans in to question the guests on board.

"M... Mr. 9..." the creepy guy stutters.

"Miss Wednesday..." the blue-haired beauty says.

"Right... Something about those names have been bugging me ever since I heard'em. I feel like I've heard it before... or not... Well, in any case-" Zoro's warning to the pair is cut short by a smack to his head by the angry (but still stunning) navigator.

 _Anyway, when you get the chance, please remind him that those two are part of Baroque Works. He would know what it means if you'd just mention the name to him._

 _With all due respect, my angel, I still think it'd be a better idea if you tell him that yourself._ Sanji's plea falls on deaf ears.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sanji Kitetsu Chapter 6**

Sanji is angry. It's not the burning rightous fury he's used to feeling when he sees a lady being mistreated or when a master of his steps out of line. It makes him confused and almost... embarrassed, as if he knows he shouldn't be angry but can't help it.

The apparent source of this anger is his mossy master, who's currently engaging in what can only be described as binge drinking. Sure, it's a welcome party where everyone is having fun, and sure, they're in the midding of a drinking competition, but instead of trying to out-drink his opponents, the swordsman seems to be using that as an excuse to drown himself in that toxic liquid as quickly as possible. No cheers or even pauses when the others admit defeat and leave the table. Just one jug after another.

Sanji has a rough idea why the man is binge drinking, and if his guess is correct, this probably happens on a regular basis. He nudges the white sword to encourage the lady to say something, but the white blade continues her act as an inanimate object.

Sanji is _not_ angry at the lady. He is definitely _not_ blaming her for refusing to resolve that irritating misunderstanding with their idiotic master. But the scene before him is making him crave a cigarette... or at least some second hand smoke that'd help calm his nerves in the days when he had a master who smoked.

 _Hey shithead, take it easy will you? You're not supposed to die of alcohol poisoning before I get the chance to kill you myself._

 _Why don't you tell Nami to take it easy?_ Zoro tilts his head to point to the next table and pours another jug down his throat.

 _Nami-san's clearly enjoying herself. See, she's laughing! You on the other hand look like you're planning your own murder._

 _Get used to it, Curly. This is how I have fun._ Zoro wipes his mouth with the back of his hand after yet another jug. Sanji frowns at the man.

 _Remember the freeloaders on our way here? I heard they're part of Baroque Works._ Sanji caves. He was trying to hold out passing the message as long as possible so that Kuina can do it herself, but it looks like she has no intentions of speaking to the man. At least the message seems to distract Zoro from the drinks.

 _Hn, bounty hunters? That's a shame. Their booze is good._ Zoro smirks and slams his empty jug onto the table with an exaggerated _thud_ and mutters "I can't drink... anymore..." in a horribly fake drunk voice before lying face down on the table.

 _Wake me up when they make their move._ The swordsman instructs his blade. It only takes a few seconds before he begins snoring.

 _Phew. I thought he was drunk beyond reason._ Sanji turns to white sword.

 _You don't ever have to worry about that. He's never drunk no matter how much he drinks._ Kuina giggles for the first time since they set foot on the island.

 _Is that why you can sit back and watch him try to drown his misery with alcohol like this every time?_ Sanji hates how accusatory the question sounds. He also hates how good it feels to ask it. The white blade falls silent once again, and Sanji's mind races to pull together a decent appology.

 _Sorry, it's-_

 _No, you're right. It was my fault he's not moving on, and I should've done something about it. But you see, I'm not the real Kuina. The previous Wado explained this to me before giving up her existance to make room for me. I'm just a projection, a copy of Kuina's thoughts and emotions at the time of the transfer. That's all we are as swords. We can grow and change through experiences, but we can't claim to be the human beings we once were. For me to talk to Zoro as Kuina would be out right deceit, and we'd both hate it._

 _At least you could let him know that Kuina didn't blame him for her death._

 _I can't say that. I'm not Kuina. I don't know for sure what she thought._

 _But you don't blame him. Why would you think she might've blamed him?_

 _All I know is that she didn't blame him at the time of her death._

 _Then tell him that!_

 _What good is it? I can't even channel the real Kuina if he wants to talk to her. Not the past one when she was alive, and not the spirit after her death either. What good is it for him to hear from a fake?_

 _Let him decide if you're a fake or not._ Sanji takes a deep breath, making sure his voice is calm and gentle this time. _Tell him everything you told me and let him draw his own conclusions. He maybe an insensitive prick, but he's not unreasonable. He won't be offended if you're being honest, right?_

 _You know him well for someone who just met him a couple weeks ago._ Kuina giggles once more.

 _Ah sorry, I didn't mean to sound like a know-it-all. Of course you'd know him way better than me, having put up with that brute for so long..._

 _Thank you, Sanji. I'll find the chance to talk to him._

"W-WHAT? TH-THIRTY MILLION BELI?!" A few voices shout in unison just outside the window before Sanji can reply. He looks up and finds the party room empty except the crew, all content and sound asleep. The swordsman stirs from the shouting.

 _Hey moss head, time to make up for the work you missed on the ship._

Zoro sits up and yawns before drawing Wado from her sheath.

 _Yeah, let's go._


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:**

 **I'm still in survival mode in real life, and the fact that I had time to write this was pure luck, so don't get too used to updates. :P**

* * *

 **Sanji Kitetsu Chapter 7**

 _Well shit, I almost thought you sounded kinda cool back there._ Sanji mocks as the swordsman moves silently through the shadows, avoiding the eyes of about a hundred bounty hunters that populate the town.

 _What was it? "A true swordsman never allows alcohol to take control of himself?"_

 _Geez you're noisy. I can't hear their footsteps if you keep talking._ Zoro leans against the wall and peeks around the corner at the crowd.

 _Why don't you just admit that you've never had a successful attempt at self harm by drowning in alcohol despite trying for years because you never realized that your breed of seaweed naturally thrives in any alcoholic environment?_

A hunter fires at the swordsman from above, forcing him to take shelter inside the building.

 _If you nag any more you'll become a granny._ Zoro finds himself the target of pistols from all sides and dodges behind a table just in time. _Now then, this'll be an excellent chance to test out you boys. First up is Yuki. No need to hold back._

 _Yes Master! I'll do my best!_ The swordsman draws the black blade and easily breaks through both the table and the line of attackers.

 _Very light. You're a fine blade, Yuki. Be proud._ Zoro switches the young blade into his left hand, tapping his thumb on the hilt in approval. Sanji hears a timid hum of confidence from his fellow sword.

 _Hey kid, no need to actually CALL him "Master" there! I know that's what he is, but you're only feeding his over-sized ego._ Sanji snickers, and Yubashiri lets out a ring of slight confusion. Ah, that's right. Yuki might still be getting used to using the human language. _You did great back there by the way. Keep it up, and you'll be fine._

 _Thank you, Sanji-nii-san!_ Yubashiri chirps as the swordsman escapes another band of pursuers and dodges a cannon ball.

 _Don't you mean baa-san? He's probably old enough to be one too._ Zoro drives Yubashiri through a barrel of wine and eyes the spilling liquid in regret.

 _Stop joking around and focus, shitty moss! Behind you!_ Sanji warns as a hunter approaches with a stone axe from the swordsman's blind spot.

 _Thanks for worrying, curly, but you gotta have a bit more faith in the master you chose._ The swordsman draws Sanji with his free hand and swings him toward the attacker. _Now your turn._ The cursed blade cleanly slices the giant stone into two pieces.

 _I meant for you to block that._

 _Aren't you gonna compliment me on how sharp my edge is? You're playing favorites, useless master!_

 _A masterwork blade only cuts when its user wishes to cut something._

 _Tch, I was only saving your arm from snapping under its weight. You're welcome, shitty moss!_

 _I told you to have more faith._ The swordsman raises Sanji and strikes a nun impostor and a child hunter with the back of the blade. Sanji freezes in shock. That bastard, he just used Sanji on a lady, AGAIN!

Zoro climbs a ladder to the roof top, pushing off the ladder behind him along with another dozen hunters.

 _You're gonna be a problem child, alright, but here's something you might like._ The swordsman turns to face a small group of hunters on the adjacent building. _Let's try a two sword technique._ He smirks and raises both blades.

 _Nitoryu: Taka Nami_

Sanji barely has the time to perceive a tinge of curiosity before he's spun through the air fast enough to make his blade vibrate and ring. He feels Yubashiri's eagerness beside him expanding and finally merging with his own excitement, resonating to form a powerful shock wave until it finally leaves them both and pushes itself toward the group of hunters.

Sanji has been used in numerous sword techniques in his life so far. Many of them were rather disappointing, but also a few that left him breathless (figuratively). He has never been in a multi-sword technique though. That was-

 _Having fun?_ Zoro smirks while casually cuts a circle on the roof top with Yubashiri.

 _It was... alright._ Sanji hates to admit it, but that move makes the swordsman rather cool.

 _You did well. You two will make a fine team._ The master taps his thumbs on both of their hilts. Yubashiri rings happily with pride.

 _Of course we will! You don't have to tell me how I did._ Sanji mutters.

 _I thought you were asking for compliments._

 _I was NOT._

 _By the way,_ the swordsman turns to watch another mob of hunters fall through the hole he cut. _Thank you for talking to Kuina._

 _Don't worry about it. Wasn't doing it for you._

 _Come to think of it, aren't you being too much of a nice guy? You're a cursed blade after all. This is not gonna come back and bite me one day, is it?_

Sanji notices another hunter approaching from the swordsman's blind spot with a ladder. He stops himself from warning the swordsman. The guy did tell him to have more faith. His master surprisingly manages to dodge the first attack but is still tackled to the ground by what appears to be a gorilla in a dress. One punch, and the swordsman's forehead begins to trickle with blood.

 _If you want to repay me that badly, I wouldn't say no to some of that blood of yours._

 _I'll think about it._ The man smirks.


	8. Chapter 8

**Edit July 9th, 2018: A/N:**

 **On July 9th, 2018 Minecraft Guardiansaiyan wrote:**

I am SURE Luffy cares about one of his crew...cursed or NOT!

 **I cut that part out because I was over the word limit (trying to stick to 1k per chapter), but you're right. Luffy needs to say something because this is important. So I'm adding it back in (near the end).**

 **BTW, sorry Lama for ignoring your request to see the little chat between Zoro and Kuina. I was in a hurry to post this one because all hell was breaking loose in the background as I was finishing up, so I skipped the author's notes. Lemme put that in next time.**

* * *

 **Sanji Kitetsu Chapter 8**

"Would you please mind not pointing such dangerous weapons at me?" the intruder hums as Carmen and Usopp are sent flying over the rails onto the lower deck. Then Sanji is spun out of the swordsman's grip and lands disgracefully next to Nami's Clima-Tact. A few more loud clatters inform him that his fellow swords have joined him on the wooden deck.

"Shit! Is it a devil fruit? What ability does she have?!" Zoro doesn't sound like he's enjoying this battle as much as the ones they just faught on the last island.

"No need to get so riled up." the intruder hums again in a strangely mesmerizing voice, "I haven't come here on any orders, nor do I have any reasons for fighting you people."

Sanji, being drawn in by such a soothing voice, finds himself gently floating past the green head of his master toward the dark haired beauty. Ah, this must be what the voice of a goddess is like. Maybe that's what she is.

"You have an interesting sword here, Swordsman-san. I suppose you are aware that it's cursed." A cool soft finger runs teasingly along Sanji's hilt, making him shiver in delight.

"Don't _touch_ him!" The swordsman's growl snaps Sanji out of his trance. He's now curiously perched on the upper deck rail by his hilt.

"I do hope you're not feeding it too much of your blood, but by your current situation I suppose it's already had enough to offset the Kitetsu curse. How unfortunate for small-time pirates like you to have to look after a princess targeted by the entire Baroque Works organization, and how unfortunate for your log post to point to Little Garden as your next destination. A Kitetsu blade. A true bringer of misfortune. How fitting of its name that its master's entire crew would reach the end of their lives like this." The lady says with the faintest smile pulling at the corner of her lips.

Sanji looks around at his master's crew and finds that almost all eyes are on him. Usopp is hiding behind the mast and pulling out a cross necklace from his backpack. Nami wears a serious expression, no doubt considering the possible consequences of his curse. Carmen glares at him with clear disgust. The princess is on the verge of tears as if Sanji's blade itself is draining all her hope. Luffy's hat blocks his eyes from view, and Sanji's master is as expressionless as ever, drilling holes on Sanji's blue gem with his eyes.

For a moment, Sanji considers the possibility of leaving the scene before he has to hear from his moss head master that he's no longer needed. It's doable. He just needs to make a couple calculated bounces on the deck below until he flies off the side and into the sea. But he's never left a master on his own accord before. Regardless of whether or not he got along with his masters in the past, he has always stuck with each of them until their death, although the death itself is often the result of his own efforts. He considers it part of a sword's code of honour to watch his master until the end, much like a swordsman's code of honour to never use underhanded attacks.

He's not attached of course. Good swords almost always outlast their masters, so it's not uncommon for swords to be left behind. Sanji's heard enough stories about what happens to swords at their master's death if they become attached. They rip apart their own consciousness so that their master's soul has room to live on in sword form. That's probably what happened to Wado. Sanji knows better than to become attached to a single master.

This is different though. While he understands that humans will often do extreme things to protect their bonds to other humans, being abandoned when the master is still alive and well is admittedly much harder to swallow than being parted in death. Maybe he can plot the moss head's death early? But the man hasn't done anything that warrants a murder...

"Give him back before I cut you." Zoro picks up his remaining swords from the deck. He sheathes Yubashiri and gives Wado a whisk to his side.

 _Hey shithead, I was just plotting your murder, so watch your manners and don't give me more reasons to go through with it!_

 _Shut up and get back here already. I know you can at least make yourself fall._ The swordsman snaps back with impatience.

Sanji tries to lean over the rail and soon finds that he's held in place by something he can't see. The intruder tosses a sheathed sword over the rail instead. Zoro raises his free hand and catches it by the sheathe.

"Maybe you'd be able to avoid your future troubles with this. Kashu, one of the 50 Ryo Wasamono blades. It used to belong to one of our agents before he was captured by the Marines. How about it? Not a bad trade if I say so myself. It's a better grade than your Kitetsu here, and unlike this one, it's not cursed."

"What, is she not a bad person after all?" Nami eyes the sword in the swordsman's hand.

"It's a trap. It's definitely a trap." Usopp mumbles from behind the mast. Carmen opens her mouth to chime in, but before she speaks a word, Kashu hits the water with a splash.

"I said give me back my sword!" Zoro growls again and points Wado at the intruder.

"Are you an idiot?" Carmen digs one of her hot pink heels into the back of swordsman's head. "She came all the way out here to warn us about your cursed sword! What are you going to do if that sword of yours is really going to curse us to death?!"

"What makes you think I'd let someone else choose my swords for me? Oi Luffy, can I cut her already?"

"Just what I was thinking. I've decided I don't like her!" the captain huffs.

"I see. How unfortunate." the woman smiles. With a snap of her fingers, Sanji tips and falls to the deck below, planting his blade into the wood to make himself stand. When he looks up again, the intruder has vanished from the ship.


End file.
